I THOUGHT she was my best friend...

When I was in the third grade I met a girl. This girl instantly became my best friend. 15 years later, I still consider her one of my best friends... I think. She got engaged a little over a month ago. Since then, she has set the date and even gotten close to finding her band. If I'm not mistaken, the second you get engaged you basically tell all your friends if they will be your maid of honor or bridesmaid, right? Well, I haven't gotten anything like that yet. Maybe I'm just jumping to conclusions. I have a younger sister, not too much younger, and the best friend I speak of was going to be my maid of honor over her if I ever got married. Not there yet, but I'm terribly afraid that I won't even play any part in this girl's wedding. Have I lost my best friend and not known? Is she really closer to her other girlfriends? Does she not remember that we grew up together? Does she not remember telling me all her secrets or me telling her all my secrets? And what about when we had our first cigarette together? (And we are both still smoking to this very day). Her wedding is in May of 2010. I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for the next year, but after that I'm giving up all hope of having a best friend. 15 years is a long time... and I hope she doesn't screw me over. I guess I'd better start thinking of other options for a bridesmaid.

See, this is kinda like AIDS...

I don't feel like making this very long. Not in a great mood. Long story short my boyfrind learned his "best friend's" secret language. Yeah, they're in thier twenties. I knew a secret langage in 6th grade and have since forgotten it. He won't tell me what it is, because his word to his friend i more important than our relationship. I guess if I wasn't PMSing it would be a little different. No, not really. He told me that I was the most important thing to him in his life, I'm more of a best friend to him than anyone he has ever known, and he wants to spend the rest of his life with me. Then tell me the damn language!! I have never been so hurt and left out from something from someone who suppposedly loves me so much. AAAARRRRGGGHHH!!!!